Call our Helpline: 1800 203 136 - Mon-Fri 9am to 4.30pm

West Cork Beacon

Wolfe Tone Square, Bantry Co. Cork
P75 TN96

Office Hours:
Monday - Friday
9.00AM - 4.30PM

Telephone:
027 53847

Support Line:
1800 203 136

Types of Abuse/Violence

West Cork Beacon offers free, non judgmental and confidential listening. We provide both information and support services

Domestic Abuse

Domestic Abuse is an umbrella term that can include some or all of the various types of abuse.

It is a pattern of abuse that worsens over time. It is about obtaining power and maintaining control over another. It is present in intimate and dating relationships, particularly between women and men, adult-child to parent and elder abuse.

Sustained abuse chips away at your confidence and self-respect, making you feel humiliated and worthless.

Emotional

  • Constantly being criticised, shouted at and put down
  • Name-calling in private and/or in front of others
  • Not listening, sulking or responding when you do something they don’t approve of
  • Being jealous of other relationships with family, friends or colleagues
  • Threatening to leave, to self -harm or threaten suicide
  • Threats to hurt you, your children or others you care about including pets
  • Threats to destroy your property, belongings, or car

Gaslighting

  • Lying to you or withholding information from you
  • Hiding or misplacing items such as car keys and important documents
  • Telling your family and friends lies about you
  • Being manipulated so that you question your own memory, perception and sanity

Coercive control

  • Restricting where you can travel to or who you can see
  • Monitoring the petrol or diesel you have used in your car or the distance you have travelled
  • Not allowing friends or family to the house or stopping you from spending time with them
  • Monitoring your whereabouts by following you or using tracking devices on your phone
  • Opening your post and emails
  • Micromanaging what you can eat, being weighed by him so as not to put on weight
  • Restricting what you can wear
  • Constant criticism

Physical

  • Being shoved, slapped or punched
  • Being pinched, bitten, kicked or spat at
  • Having hair pulled, being burned
  • Throwing items at you as a weapon
  • Use of knives or hammers against you
  • Attempted choking or strangulation

Financial

  • Controlling all household money and needing to show receipts
  • Denying you access to your bank account or shared bank accounts
  • Sabotaging your work or preventing you from attending work (example: hiding your car keys/ not turning up for childcare)
  • Withholding money for food, household or personal items
  • Not paying bills, rent or the mortgage and allowing arrears to build up
  • Not paying child maintenance as agreed or at all
  • Running up bills in your name (creation of debt)
  • Maxing out your line of credit

Digital

  • Using technology such as tracking devices to monitor your locations and activities
  • Monitoring all of your online activity by checking your search history.
  • Demanding the passwords to your online accounts
  • Denying access to technology to isolate you
  • Sending excessive amounts of voice calls, emails and texts
  • Harassing you by sending insulting or threatening texts or messages
  • Sending abusive messages online to threaten you and/or your family
  • Making fake profiles to harass you
  • Sharing intimate and private pictures or messages online

Stalking

  • Loitering around your home or following you
  • Spying or tracking your movements
  • Making unwanted approaches to you
  • Making unwanted approaches to friends, family or colleagues
  • Breaking into your home or damaging your property
  • Sending inappropriate communication (letters, texts, phone calls or gifts)
  • Digitally stalking you (online including social media)
  • Distributing malicious material about you

Sexual Violence

Sexual Violence is an umbrella term that can include some or all of the various types of
sexual abuse.

It is any sexual act which takes place without freely given consent or where someone forces
or manipulates someone else into unwanted sexual activity.

Sexual violence can be perpetrated by a partner or ex-partner, family member, friend,
colleague, acquaintance or a complete stranger. Sexual Violence can happen to anyone at any age.

Rape

Rape occurs where a person is subjected, without consent, to an act that involves penetration by another person. Rape isn’t sex, if there is no consent then it’s not sex, it’s rape – no matter the circumstances.

No-one ever deserves or asks for rape to happen. 100% of the blame lies with the perpetrator (the person who carried it out)

The legal definition of rape is very limited and doesn’t always match with the experiences of survivors. We offer support for survivors to use the words that are most meaningful to them
to describe their experiences and can guide them through the terminology should they wish to pursue legal action.

Sexual Assault

Sexual Assault is an act of physical assault that has a sexual aspect or motivation. It includes unwanted kissing, touching or any non-consensual sexual activity that does not involve penetration.

This is a serious criminal offence. It can have a serious and lasting impact on the survivor.

Aggravated sexual assault is a crime of sexual assault that involves serious violence or threat of serious violence, or that cause injury, humiliation or degradation to a person.

Sexual Harassment

Sexual Harassment is when a person is subjected to unwanted verbal or physical sexual advances or requests for sexual favours. It can make someone feel upset, scared, offended
or humiliated.

Some people believe sexual harassment mainly happens at work, but it can happen anywhere and take many forms.

It includes crude or sexually explicit remarks or language, private sexual images or videos shared without permission, someone exposing themselves physically or showing sexually
explicit photos or pictures, inappropriate sexual advances or physical contact that made the person feel offended, humiliated or offended, or any other sexually inappropriate behaviour
that has affected them in this way.

Child Sexual Abuse

This form of sexual abuse occurs when a child is used by another person for his or her gratification or sexual arousal, or for that of others.

In Ireland, the age of sexual consent is 17 years and any sexual activity under that age is a crime, regardless of consent. It is unwanted and can involve pressure, manipulation,
bullying, intimidation, threats, deception or force.

Types of sexual offences against children include defilement; the production, distribution and possession of child sexual abuse material (called in Irish law 'child pornography'); the sexual exploitation of a child; child trafficking and taking a child for purposes of sexual exploitation; soliciting, importuning or meeting a child for the purpose of sexual exploitation.

Online

Unwanted sexual comments or sexualised contact which takes place on the internet (on social media, message boards, websites, WhatsApp or other online contact) are all
considered to be online sexual harassment.

 It is an offence under Irish law to share, or threaten to share, intimate images of a person without their consent, with or without intent to cause harm to the victim. The law also makes
it an offence to send an intimate image purporting or claiming to be of another person even if the image is not actually of them, known as a 'deep fake’. 

Cyber flashing is a form of indecent exposure that takes place online. It is when someone
sends a photo or video of their genitals to another person without their consent.